An Aussie drover walks into a pub with his pet crocodile by his side . . .
He puts the crocodile up on the bar, turns to the astonished patrons and says, "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this crocodile's mouth and place my manhood inside.
Then the croc will close his mouth for one minute. Then he'll open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed."
In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink."
The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers and placed his Johnson and related parts in the crocodile's open mouth.
The croc closed his mouth and the crowd gasped.
After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and smacked the crocodile hard on the top of its head.
The croc opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals, unscathed as promised.
The crowd cheered, and the first of his free drinks were delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try."
A hush fell over the crowd.
After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A Blonde woman timidly spoke up . . .
"I'll try it . . . just don't hit me so hard with the beer bottle!"
STORMBRINGER SENDS
Sunday, May 24, 2015
Saturday, May 16, 2015
". . . SMOKING RUINS AND CRYING WIDOWS"
When people say good things about my status as a veteran I have a couple of stock answers: I say it was better than working for a living, and I say that I am not a hero, but I served in the company of heroes. Both are the God's honest truth, and I am eternally grateful for the opportunity to have served as a United States soldier. It was an honor and a privilege . . . S.L.
Looking back, something drew me to it like a magnet, almost as if it was Fate. I was fortunate to make my way to America as an immigrant and to find my way into the greatest Army that ever marched across a battlefield. A series of good decisions and a lot of hard work got me into Special Forces where you don't earn the Green Beret after graduation - you earn it every day, by deed and thought.
Now I'm no altruist - I'm not Mother Theresa and I'm no Boy Scout - and I know I was fortunate to fall into a profession that in many ways is a cause; I fight Evil. I got here almost by chance because growing up everybody I knew - to include my family - was against me joining the military. They made fun of my dreams and ambition to be a soldier, told me I was misguided and out of my mind.
What I do nowadays is an extension of that; I'm still fit enough to carry on the fight, to make a difference in my own little way through my work in the security profession. I'm not wealthy but if I was I'd do everything I could to stand up my own Army and take the fight to the terrorist scum enemy who threaten everything we hold dear and love, whose evil cause is the destruction of Civilization itself. If I had the resources and the right sponsors I would go to the terrorist countries and start taking their cities apart brick by brick.
There would be no more Somali pirates because they would be swinging from gallows with the ravens picking at their eye sockets and their palaces would be smoking ruins. The rat bastards decapitating Christians and tearing apart ancient heritage sites would be a mere footnote in the dustbin of history and it wouldn't be hard because they're stupid enough to parade around in trucks and wave their flags all over the place. I'd call in the A-10 squadron of my private air force and the Warthogs would feast on them day and night.
Drastic situations call for drastic measures; if I could have my way we'd adopt a Zero Tolerance Policy towards terrorists and terrorist wannabes in our own midst. Any immigrant who joins the cause of Evil will pay and his or her family will pay - expulsion back to whatever hell hole country they came from. "Sorry about that shit, sure sucks to be you, should have thought about that before you decided to be a big, bad Terr." We simply will not allow our benevolence towards the outcasts of the world be mistaken for weakness; we will not allow ourselves to be exploited by the harbingers of hatred who at this very moment dwell among us.
The terrorist enemy we currently face is the closest thing to Evil Incarnate I can possibly imagine. Those who are captured alive would be given tribunals in accordance with the Hague and Geneva Conventions, then tied to stakes and shot; in accordance with the Hague and Geneva Conventions. We will allow three out of every group to live - so their stories are corroborated - to go back and tell all the others how we wrapped the bodies of the terrorists in pig skins and buried them in graves filled with pig fat and pig guts. And in the end it would be like Lt. Col Ralph Peters said: we would ". . . leave behind smoking ruins and crying widows" . . . only there wouldn't be that many widows.
The so-called altruists and hand-wringers in the media may not like it but in the end the annals of History will tell of how good, decent people stood up and refused to allow Civilization to be held hostage and destroyed by evil murderous nihilistic death cult fanatics, and what we did to expunge this outright Evil from the world. Just like we did to the Fascists and Imperial Japanese war criminals and yes even the Soviet Communists when we shut down their killing machines.
"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." - George Orwell
STORMBRINGER SENDS
Looking back, something drew me to it like a magnet, almost as if it was Fate. I was fortunate to make my way to America as an immigrant and to find my way into the greatest Army that ever marched across a battlefield. A series of good decisions and a lot of hard work got me into Special Forces where you don't earn the Green Beret after graduation - you earn it every day, by deed and thought.
Now I'm no altruist - I'm not Mother Theresa and I'm no Boy Scout - and I know I was fortunate to fall into a profession that in many ways is a cause; I fight Evil. I got here almost by chance because growing up everybody I knew - to include my family - was against me joining the military. They made fun of my dreams and ambition to be a soldier, told me I was misguided and out of my mind.
What I do nowadays is an extension of that; I'm still fit enough to carry on the fight, to make a difference in my own little way through my work in the security profession. I'm not wealthy but if I was I'd do everything I could to stand up my own Army and take the fight to the terrorist scum enemy who threaten everything we hold dear and love, whose evil cause is the destruction of Civilization itself. If I had the resources and the right sponsors I would go to the terrorist countries and start taking their cities apart brick by brick.
There would be no more Somali pirates because they would be swinging from gallows with the ravens picking at their eye sockets and their palaces would be smoking ruins. The rat bastards decapitating Christians and tearing apart ancient heritage sites would be a mere footnote in the dustbin of history and it wouldn't be hard because they're stupid enough to parade around in trucks and wave their flags all over the place. I'd call in the A-10 squadron of my private air force and the Warthogs would feast on them day and night.
Drastic situations call for drastic measures; if I could have my way we'd adopt a Zero Tolerance Policy towards terrorists and terrorist wannabes in our own midst. Any immigrant who joins the cause of Evil will pay and his or her family will pay - expulsion back to whatever hell hole country they came from. "Sorry about that shit, sure sucks to be you, should have thought about that before you decided to be a big, bad Terr." We simply will not allow our benevolence towards the outcasts of the world be mistaken for weakness; we will not allow ourselves to be exploited by the harbingers of hatred who at this very moment dwell among us.
The terrorist enemy we currently face is the closest thing to Evil Incarnate I can possibly imagine. Those who are captured alive would be given tribunals in accordance with the Hague and Geneva Conventions, then tied to stakes and shot; in accordance with the Hague and Geneva Conventions. We will allow three out of every group to live - so their stories are corroborated - to go back and tell all the others how we wrapped the bodies of the terrorists in pig skins and buried them in graves filled with pig fat and pig guts. And in the end it would be like Lt. Col Ralph Peters said: we would ". . . leave behind smoking ruins and crying widows" . . . only there wouldn't be that many widows.
The so-called altruists and hand-wringers in the media may not like it but in the end the annals of History will tell of how good, decent people stood up and refused to allow Civilization to be held hostage and destroyed by evil murderous nihilistic death cult fanatics, and what we did to expunge this outright Evil from the world. Just like we did to the Fascists and Imperial Japanese war criminals and yes even the Soviet Communists when we shut down their killing machines.
"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." - George Orwell
STORMBRINGER SENDS
Thursday, May 14, 2015
ROLEX
I've posted the story of how Rolex became the iconic military man's signature timepiece: PRISONER of WAR ROLEX's Part 1, also Part 2, and Part 3. I wear a Rolex - saved up and bought it at the PX in Okinawa, a sort of present to myself that I'd arrived at where I wanted to be in Life. Around the same time I learned why we professional military men wear Rolex's . . . Hint: it ain't to tell the time . . . S.L.
The primary purpose of the Rolex - to a professional adventurer - is not as a timepiece but rather as a life insurance policy. When the situation goes pear-shaped and you've somehow made it to the airport, the Rolex buys you a seat on the last flight out of Heart of Darkness International Airport.
As your aircraft circles the city, you look down at the rising columns of black smoke and imagine the scene downtown in the city square where they're chopping the few remaining Westerners up into monkey meat, you look at your wrist where your treasured timepiece used to be and you think 2 things:
A) 'Well I guess the Rolex finally paid for itself . . .'
and
B) 'I can always buy another watch . . .'
STORMBRINGER SENDS
The primary purpose of the Rolex - to a professional adventurer - is not as a timepiece but rather as a life insurance policy. When the situation goes pear-shaped and you've somehow made it to the airport, the Rolex buys you a seat on the last flight out of Heart of Darkness International Airport.
As your aircraft circles the city, you look down at the rising columns of black smoke and imagine the scene downtown in the city square where they're chopping the few remaining Westerners up into monkey meat, you look at your wrist where your treasured timepiece used to be and you think 2 things:
A) 'Well I guess the Rolex finally paid for itself . . .'
and
B) 'I can always buy another watch . . .'
STORMBRINGER SENDS
RUMORS OF MY DEATH ARE GREATLY EXAGGERATED . . .
I owe an explanation to my loyal followers: no, I'm not dead - rapid deployment came up and coincided with critical blogwriter's burnout - apologies I should have said something but I was honestly too focused on real-world issues . . . the following email exchange with a journo who reached out might serve as an explanation . . . S.L.
Heart of Darkness International Airport
Hi Sean:
Really interesting blog on Eeben Barlow and Executive Outcomes. I'm a freelance journalist, writing a piece on the positive work done by external (a.k.a. 'mercenary') forces in Africa and the way they can aid the countries they operate in. Hoping to get in touch with a few people who can give me some insight into governmental and non-governmental military actions. Would you be willing to open a dialogue with me on these sorts of issues?
Thanks, Joe T.
Executive Outcomes personnel in Sierra Leone, circa 1997
Hello Joe,
What a coincidence - right now I'm on contract in SW Africa - you may have gathered that from the lack of activity on my blog. Don't wish to come across as rude, but talking with journalists is often a career-ending move in this line of work. Still, there's a bit of an air gap with the S.L. persona . . . if we get into sensitive territory I'll back off.
FWIW I do not care for the term 'mercenary' - it suggests a gun-for-hire - I am not that, there are some things I will not do - and also suggests an organization that maneuvers against an enemy force. The operation I am involved with does not do that - we are a security company. It would be the broadest stretch to describe the modern private military companies or security firms as mercenary outfits. I refer to myself as a security professional or consultant.
To the best of my knowledge there have been relatively few mercenary activities in Africa in recent years; Sandline and Executive Outcomes were pulling missions in Sierra Leone and Liberia in the 90s; I was still on active duty at that time and was active in West Africa. Late 90's up to 2001 I became aware of Serbians and Ukrainians involved in mercenary work in Africa but haven't heard anything more recently.
Please do not quote me directly; especially if the sentence or paragraph includes the word 'mercenary' - if word got back to my employers that would be a career-ender and could probably get our company thrown out of country.
I don't know if I can be much use to your project given the above constraints but I simply cannot have my name associated with the term 'mercenary' - often synonymous with 'war criminal' and I definitely am not that.
Having said all that I just recalled two operations I am aware of where private armies are maneuvering against an armed foe. The actual extent of their operations I am not aware of, but it might be able to give you a start point.
Hope this helps - S.L.
The Compound
Hi Sean:
Thanks for the reply, getting an inside perspective on what can be a misunderstood industry is really interesting to me (and hopefully some readers). The article I am looking to write will be called something like 'The role of foreign security consultants in Africa's future' - working title. It will focus on how they can be a force for good, and achieve things that both local forces and external armies cannot.
I completely understand, it definitely has negative connotations. The article I want to write is going to address why these perceptions are outdated and wrong. That's why I phrased it 'mercenaries' in quotes - It's not a term I'm planning on using except to disown it. I'll make sure any questions I ask can be answered without compromising either your confidentiality or your ethics.
Could be useful to establish the boundaries of what you can and can't discuss, few brief questions to start with and see how we get on?
Thanks, Joe T.
P.S. Could you give me a few details about the 2 operations you mentioned?
The AO
Answer to your questions:
I'm afraid I cannot name my employer and the reason why is the splash it would make on our client would be a disaster. Large multinational corporations do not want attention on their security arrangements, for a couple of reasons; A) security concerns (obviously) and B) negative publicity. Lets just leave it at mining operations, SW Africa. I will describe the work we are doing in general terms: physical security, evacuation planning and rehearsal, and emergency medical support.
I suppose you can reference 'Sean Linnane' - I adopted the nom-de-guerre for precisely this reason and the anonymity has held up, which surprises me because it seems that anybody doing about 5 minutes of detective work could determine my real identity - but again, please do not refer to me as a 'mercenary' because I am not that. Security professional, retired US Special Forces, professional soldier, security consultant - these are how I describe myself and they are all accurate. I am not a mercenary because there are some things I simply will not do, and they include: A) treason, B) murder, C) drug dealing and D) human trafficking.
One guy I know told me he figured out who SL was from my writing style - he is an old Team Leader with whom I served in C Co 1st Bn/1st SFG in Okinawa. I took this as a compliment. Around 2010 I became aware that Special Forces soldiers in Afghanistan - when they were required to sign for supplies from support units - were signing "Sean Linnane". I took this too as a compliment and I actually regard this as a measure of immortality.
The 2 operations I mentioned:
SOLI training NPU soldiers at a covert training facility north of Mosul, December, 2014
1) Sons of Liberty International (SOLI) - their current mission is consulting and training Iraqi Christians to fight ISIS.
A colleague of mine - whom I count as a friend - is currently trying to sign on with SOLI. We served together and he - like myself - is an immigrant to the United States who earned his citizenship the same way I did: military service. I do not know at this time whether or not SOLI has accepted him.
FBR medic attending to a patient
2) Free Burma Rangers - "The Free Burma Rangers (FBR) is a multi-ethnic humanitarian service movement. They bring help, hope and love to people in the war zones of Burma. Ethnic pro-democracy groups send teams to FBR to be trained, supplied and sent into the areas under attack to provide emergency medical care, shelter, food, clothing and human rights documentation. The teams also operate a communication and information network inside Burma that provides real time information from areas under attack."
Regarding the Free Burma Rangers, I personally know the American (former US Army Ranger / Special Forces) mentioned in this article. I've known him since I was a kid, actually.
The FBR are associated with the Karen National Liberation Army Finding information about the KNLA on the internet is difficult because the regime in Rangoon has an active disinformation campaign against them and wipes out referenced links, articles etc. Here's what I could find regarding their foreign military professionals:
Yangon's Anti-Rebel Offensive Rages On
Another outfit involving foreign professional soldiers is the Dwekh Nawsha, a military organization created in mid 2014 in order to defend Iraq's Assyrian Christians from the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL), and possibly retake their lands currently controlled by ISIL. The article points out that they seem to be having internal political challenges that is affecting their ability to retain foreign fighters.
None of the above organizations are active in Africa, however. The Foreign Legion has units stationed in Africa, of course, and I was actually present on a battlefield with elements from the 13th DBLE, in Cote d'Ivoire. The security profession here on the continent is infested with ex-Legionnaires, of course - it is part of their retirement program - and I have been involved with some of them. I speak French so that's a bit of an icebreaker.
Hope this helps - and thank you for helping me break out of the rut I am in with the blog.
STORMBRINGER SENDS
Heart of Darkness International Airport
Hi Sean:
Really interesting blog on Eeben Barlow and Executive Outcomes. I'm a freelance journalist, writing a piece on the positive work done by external (a.k.a. 'mercenary') forces in Africa and the way they can aid the countries they operate in. Hoping to get in touch with a few people who can give me some insight into governmental and non-governmental military actions. Would you be willing to open a dialogue with me on these sorts of issues?
Thanks, Joe T.
Executive Outcomes personnel in Sierra Leone, circa 1997
Hello Joe,
What a coincidence - right now I'm on contract in SW Africa - you may have gathered that from the lack of activity on my blog. Don't wish to come across as rude, but talking with journalists is often a career-ending move in this line of work. Still, there's a bit of an air gap with the S.L. persona . . . if we get into sensitive territory I'll back off.
FWIW I do not care for the term 'mercenary' - it suggests a gun-for-hire - I am not that, there are some things I will not do - and also suggests an organization that maneuvers against an enemy force. The operation I am involved with does not do that - we are a security company. It would be the broadest stretch to describe the modern private military companies or security firms as mercenary outfits. I refer to myself as a security professional or consultant.
To the best of my knowledge there have been relatively few mercenary activities in Africa in recent years; Sandline and Executive Outcomes were pulling missions in Sierra Leone and Liberia in the 90s; I was still on active duty at that time and was active in West Africa. Late 90's up to 2001 I became aware of Serbians and Ukrainians involved in mercenary work in Africa but haven't heard anything more recently.
Please do not quote me directly; especially if the sentence or paragraph includes the word 'mercenary' - if word got back to my employers that would be a career-ender and could probably get our company thrown out of country.
I don't know if I can be much use to your project given the above constraints but I simply cannot have my name associated with the term 'mercenary' - often synonymous with 'war criminal' and I definitely am not that.
Having said all that I just recalled two operations I am aware of where private armies are maneuvering against an armed foe. The actual extent of their operations I am not aware of, but it might be able to give you a start point.
Hope this helps - S.L.
The Compound
Hi Sean:
Thanks for the reply, getting an inside perspective on what can be a misunderstood industry is really interesting to me (and hopefully some readers). The article I am looking to write will be called something like 'The role of foreign security consultants in Africa's future' - working title. It will focus on how they can be a force for good, and achieve things that both local forces and external armies cannot.
I completely understand, it definitely has negative connotations. The article I want to write is going to address why these perceptions are outdated and wrong. That's why I phrased it 'mercenaries' in quotes - It's not a term I'm planning on using except to disown it. I'll make sure any questions I ask can be answered without compromising either your confidentiality or your ethics.
Could be useful to establish the boundaries of what you can and can't discuss, few brief questions to start with and see how we get on?
- Can you say who you work for and where you are operating?
- Can I quote you using the 'Sean Linnane' alias?
Thanks, Joe T.
P.S. Could you give me a few details about the 2 operations you mentioned?
The AO
Answer to your questions:
I'm afraid I cannot name my employer and the reason why is the splash it would make on our client would be a disaster. Large multinational corporations do not want attention on their security arrangements, for a couple of reasons; A) security concerns (obviously) and B) negative publicity. Lets just leave it at mining operations, SW Africa. I will describe the work we are doing in general terms: physical security, evacuation planning and rehearsal, and emergency medical support.
I suppose you can reference 'Sean Linnane' - I adopted the nom-de-guerre for precisely this reason and the anonymity has held up, which surprises me because it seems that anybody doing about 5 minutes of detective work could determine my real identity - but again, please do not refer to me as a 'mercenary' because I am not that. Security professional, retired US Special Forces, professional soldier, security consultant - these are how I describe myself and they are all accurate. I am not a mercenary because there are some things I simply will not do, and they include: A) treason, B) murder, C) drug dealing and D) human trafficking.
One guy I know told me he figured out who SL was from my writing style - he is an old Team Leader with whom I served in C Co 1st Bn/1st SFG in Okinawa. I took this as a compliment. Around 2010 I became aware that Special Forces soldiers in Afghanistan - when they were required to sign for supplies from support units - were signing "Sean Linnane". I took this too as a compliment and I actually regard this as a measure of immortality.
The 2 operations I mentioned:
SOLI training NPU soldiers at a covert training facility north of Mosul, December, 2014
1) Sons of Liberty International (SOLI) - their current mission is consulting and training Iraqi Christians to fight ISIS.
A colleague of mine - whom I count as a friend - is currently trying to sign on with SOLI. We served together and he - like myself - is an immigrant to the United States who earned his citizenship the same way I did: military service. I do not know at this time whether or not SOLI has accepted him.
FBR medic attending to a patient
2) Free Burma Rangers - "The Free Burma Rangers (FBR) is a multi-ethnic humanitarian service movement. They bring help, hope and love to people in the war zones of Burma. Ethnic pro-democracy groups send teams to FBR to be trained, supplied and sent into the areas under attack to provide emergency medical care, shelter, food, clothing and human rights documentation. The teams also operate a communication and information network inside Burma that provides real time information from areas under attack."
Regarding the Free Burma Rangers, I personally know the American (former US Army Ranger / Special Forces) mentioned in this article. I've known him since I was a kid, actually.
The FBR are associated with the Karen National Liberation Army Finding information about the KNLA on the internet is difficult because the regime in Rangoon has an active disinformation campaign against them and wipes out referenced links, articles etc. Here's what I could find regarding their foreign military professionals:
Yangon's Anti-Rebel Offensive Rages On
Another outfit involving foreign professional soldiers is the Dwekh Nawsha, a military organization created in mid 2014 in order to defend Iraq's Assyrian Christians from the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL), and possibly retake their lands currently controlled by ISIL. The article points out that they seem to be having internal political challenges that is affecting their ability to retain foreign fighters.
None of the above organizations are active in Africa, however. The Foreign Legion has units stationed in Africa, of course, and I was actually present on a battlefield with elements from the 13th DBLE, in Cote d'Ivoire. The security profession here on the continent is infested with ex-Legionnaires, of course - it is part of their retirement program - and I have been involved with some of them. I speak French so that's a bit of an icebreaker.
Hope this helps - and thank you for helping me break out of the rut I am in with the blog.
STORMBRINGER SENDS