Friday, December 18, 2009


A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house:

Talking Dog For Sale

He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.

"I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.

"I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

"Ten dollars," the guy says.

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."

1 comment:

  1. A guy on the trail meets up with an old Indian. He asks if he can speak to the horse. The Indian says the horse don't speak. He asks the horse how the Indian treats him. The horse says... fine, he doesn't over work me and lets me graze all night long. He then asks if he can speak to the dog. The Indian says the dog doesn't speak. He asks the dog how the Indian treats him. The dog says... fine, he lets me roam all day without a leash and I eat my fill at night. He then asks the Indian if he can speak to his goat. The Indian says: "Goat lies".

    Thanks for your service to our country !

    Seattle, WA